The feeling that’s not a feeling. The one “feeling” I hate.

When something happens and you don’t know how to react.
Might feel a little shocked at first.
Like a “What the hell did you just say to me?” type of thing.
Looking at a phone screen and seeing something you didn’t want to see.
The feeling of your heart sinking.
Fingers are in a cold sweat and shaking.
Not being able to process what just happened.
Can’t process what I just heard out of my own two ears,
What I saw with my own eyes.
After trying my hardest to be mentally fine.
The countless hours trying to find happiness in things.
Healing myself and making progress everyday.
Then a get a blast of nothing.
I don’t cry.
I don’t get mad.
I don’t yell.
I don’t feel sad.
I don’t feel anything.

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